Saturday, December 6, 2008

Scams and How to Identify Them

Con Artists are Everywhere, out to get your money, through illegal and legal means.  Whether outright crooks who steal from you, or salesmen who offer you bad bargains, the net result is the same - you are snookered out of your money.

Note:  See also this great Wikipedia page which includes a list of confidence tricks.  Mandatory reading for the easily confused and gullible!

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I should not even have to add this posting to this blog. However, scam artists have proliferated in the last decade, no doubt aided and abetted by a laissez-faire administration and also the Internet.

While driving home the other day, I saw a sign on a lamp post that read, "Make executive salary from home! $10,000 per month! Call XXX-XXXX. Don't call if you don't believe!"

I almost laughed out loud at the last line, as it illustrated how these con artists work - they prey upon the BELIEF of the victim. As we know from religion, belief is something that is based on faith, and you can't argue faith logically. Thus, if you can get someone to BELIEVE something, there is no way of talking them out of it.

Here is a list of 5o-some-odd things that, in my opinion, are scams. Some of these seem so obvious they you'd wonder why I even mention them in the first place. The funny thing is, there are few, if any places on the Internet that spell out that YES, such-and-such is a scam, period.

Bear in mind that when I say "scam" I don't mean necessarily that it is illegal or fraudulent, but it could merely a bad bargain or excessively overpriced. Paying $5000 more than you should for a car is really not much different than having $5000 stolen from you at gunpoint. Either way, you are out $5000. The car salesman is considered a legitimate businessman. The fellow who mugs you is a criminal. If you can see the difference, let me know, because I surely can't.

Anyway, here's my list:

1. ANYTHING ADVERTISED ON A LAMP POST: And this goes for road sign posts and utility poles as well. They can be neatly printed signs or pieces of cardboard scrawled on with crayon. It makes no difference. A sign taped-up to a utility pole that says "Lose weight now! Call XXX-XXXX" is a scam, as are any job offers, work from home scams or anything else. Other than garage sales and lost dog notices, anything advertised on a sign taped to a lamp post is a scam, PERIOD.

2. Just about EVERYTHING advertised on TV: This category increasingly includes products embedded into the programs themselves. Many people mistakenly believe that in order to advertise on the television, your company has to be "vetted" by the TV station or that the FCC would screen out fraudulent or questionable deals. But this is not the case. And there certainly is no law against selling crappy junk or overpriced goods. Television blares the advertisements into your head, over and over again, until you start to believe that leasing a new SUV every three years "makes sense" because you (wrongly) believe that "everyone else does it". The best bargains are rarely, if ever, advertised on television. Most of what is advertised on TV is overpriced, as the advertiser has to pay the huge advertising fees - and mark up the product as a result. Television wants you to believe that a high-fructose corn syrup carbonated beverage is "refreshing" and that "lite" beer is "tastes great" and will not make you fat. Many invention brokers, credit repair agencies, payday loan places, and other bad bargains are regularly advertised on television. That does not make them good deals or endorsed by the television station. Once you STOP watching television, you can make more informed decisions. If it is advertised on TeeVee, is probably is no bargain.

3. The first three hits on GOOGLE: Google is a great tool for finding things, but increasingly, it is being shilled and sold out. The top hits on Google are usually paid advertisements that pop up whenever certain key words are typed. They are rarely good deals, and may in fact be con jobs. Google does not screen out the quality of their advertisers very well, if at all. A paid advert on Google is not some Housekeeping Seal of Approval. Even the unpaid hits are often bad choices. Keyword SPAMMING (putting keywords into metatext on a site) makes some websites move up in the rankings. Usually the con artists and the overpriced sellers use these techniques to snag sales.

4. Typo websites and weird agglomeration websites: You've seen these before. You mis-type a word in a Google search or in an URL and some other website comes up, offering helpful links to similar goods. These are usually scams or attempts to garner "referral" fees based on clicked links. In some instances, such sites may download malware to your computer. Avoid these at all costs.

5. Anything on a Pop-Up Ad. This should be self-explanatory. These are usually con jobs or bad deals. By clicking on a pop-up ad, you encourage more annoying pop-up ads. If pop-ups don't work, advertisers will stop using them. Install or activate your pop-up filter and DO NOT patronize any ad that makes it way through.

6. FINE PRINT: Car ads are famous for this. They shout about the "GREAT DEALS!" and then at the end of the ad, they flash paragraphs of text so small that only the largest Television could display them - and even then, only for a second or two. The announcer rips through the text so fast you can't understand him. In print, the text is at the bottom of the page and so small as to be barely legible. They do disclose the bad news, of course - the "GREAT DEAL" is just an OK deal if not an outright rip-off. Ask yourself this: If something was a good deal, there would be no need for "fine print" would there? Just walk away from fine print deals.

7. Classified Ads: At one time in our country, the classifieds were a good place to look for a job or buy or sell a car. No more. The Car dealers have Spammed the classifieds so much that you can't find a single listing for a car for sale by owner. Most owners have moved to Craig's list or Autotrader anyway. In addition to car dealers are the con-job ads for "Buy government auction cars for $50!" The employment section may rarely have one or two real ads for real local employers. But most of the ads are for "work at home" cons or "start a Candy Route". Very little is legitimate any more.

8. Work from Home, Candy Route, Own Your Own Business, etc.: All of these are scams, period. You cannot make millions working from home, or else everyone would do it. What they want you to do is pay for a "starter kit" or whatever, for a few thousand dollars. That's how these people make their money. You make nothing.

9. Multi-Level-Marketing, or MLM: These pyramid-like schemes have been around for ages. What they are selling is not the products (very little of that actually changes hands) but the "distributorships". The name "Multi-Level" comes from the scheme, where a distributor gets another distributor under them (who pays initiation fees and for the "starter pack") who in turn hires more distributors. As each product is sold to a customer, each person in the distribution chain gets a share of the profit. The problem with these schemes is that while a lot of distributorships are sold, little product is actually sold. Plus, since so many people are in the supply chain, the products are very overpriced when compared to convention retail outlets. There is not a lot of money to be made in selling things, period. Just walk away from MLM!

10. Anything Sold at a Seminar: You've gotten the flyers in the mail - come to our Real Estate seminar and you'll get a free barbecue grill, just for attending a 90-minute meeting! The "free" grill is a tin-foil job they sell in the grocery for three bucks. But that doesn't matter. What they are trying to do is sell time-shares or some other product. They use evangelical-like tactics, often with "shills" planted in the audience, to use mass-psychology to sell. It is very hard for most people to resist these sales techniques, so just don't go, period.

11. Time Shares: A total rip-off. People who have bought them will argue otherwise, as they don't want to admit they have been had. You pay a fee ($5,000 to $50,000) for a "week" at a "resort". If you added up all the "weeks" for that resort, you'd see that you were in effect, buying a million dollar condo, which might actually be worth only a quarter of that amount. In addition to the purchase price, you have to pay a yearly maintenance fee ($500 to $1500, which can go up at whim) which is equal to pretty much what it would cost to stay in a nearby motel. Some time-shares offer the option of swapping to other weeks or to other resorts, which is good, but usually for a small fee. You are still limited to where and when you can go on vacation, and if your financial condition changes, and you cannot go on vacation (or pay the fee) you lose the vacation week and possibly your interest in the time share. Time shares are difficult, if not impossible to sell, and if they do sell, they sell at greatly discounted prices. Take your vacation when and where you want to. In the long run, it is far cheaper and you have more control over your finances. You are not "saving" anything by buying a time share, period.

12. Unsolicited e-mails: Again this should be self-explanatory. An Oil minister in Nigeria is NOT going to send you THE SUM OF USD$10,ooo,ooo (TEN MILLION DOLLARS) through "certain modalities". SPAM advertisements for Viagra or "Rolodex Watches" are usually rip-offs as well. And no, you have not won a lottery you've never heard of or entered. It is all a come on! Just click on "this message is SPAM" and make sure your SPAM filter is ON.

13. Loud Billboards: On the way back from Florida last week (the only State that is an entire con-job, frankly) there were a series of fluorescent orange and yellow billboards for FLORIDA FRUIT STAND! JUST AHEAD! FREE JUICE! BAG OF FRUIT: $1.00!!! A good rule of thumb is that the louder and more obnoxious an advertisement is, the more likely it is a ripoff. The "free juice" of course is a small sample cup that contains maybe an ounce or two of liquid. The "bag of fruit" is not a huge bag of grapefruit, either. Again, they want you to stop. If you stop, you likely buy. So they will do anything to get you to stop.

14. MAKE MONEY IN REAL ESTATE: This falls under the SEMINARS category. They want to sell you a "system" for making money. There is no "system" and if you believe there is, you are an idiot. One of these hucksters actually advised people to buy Real Estate, over-mortgage it, and then take out the cash as a "profit". Borrowing money is not making a "profit." The only profits to be made in Real Estate are the old-fashioned ones: Buy low, sell high, rent for more than the monthly carrying cost. PERIOD.

15. PAYDAY LOANS, PAWN TITLE LOANS, etc.: Borrowing money on your paycheck or pawning your car title is never a good idea. Oftentimes the interest on these loans can exceed 30% or more. In some instances, people have paid well over 100% interest on such loans. These scams can ruin people financially. If you need money before payday, then you need to restructure your finances. A week or two is not a long time, and there is never a financial "emergency" that requires you borrow at such exorbitant rates for such short periods of time. PERIOD.

16. PYRAMID SCHEMES: Again, you'd think people would know about this by now. But the con artists keep coming up with new ways to rip people off. They call it the "money system" or some such name. Any time someone tries to sell you the idea that you can make money without work or without creating real wealth, run away. There is no such system to create wealth out of nothing. One "friend" of mine, years ago, tried to con me into sending a gold coin to a name on a chain letter. "Within weeks, you will receive gold coins from around the world!". Sorry, no sale. All that will happen is that you will be out a gold coin. I didn't fall for it, neither should you.

17. Anything selling you a "kit" or "system": Investment Gurus want you to buy their "investment kit" as do the Real Estate System scammers. You buy the "kit" and they make money, and you are a little bit (or a lot bit) poorer. Making money cannot be taught in a kit or a seminar or a book or a cassette tape set (remember those?). There is no "system" or "secret" to making money. If there were, no one would just tell you about it, they'd keep it for themselves and become fabulously rich. Just save your money, period. Don't buy the book or kit or seminar or whatever.

18. Day Trading: This falls under both Seminars and also the "kits". Buy our kit and you can start day trading stocks right away! Again, you cannot create wealth from a vacuum. Buying and selling stocks based on some arbitrary "system" that will make money on a daily basis just doesn't work. Why? Because if it did, everyone would be doing it. And if someone had the "secret" to such wealth, why on God's green earth would they SHARE it with ANYONE?

19. Anything on an Infomercial: This can be money making systems, kits, or even a potato peeler or vacuum cleaner. Are they total rip-offs? Well, if you watch Ron Popiel for a half hour and suddenly "decide" that you need a new set of steak knives or a toaster oven, is that a sound financial decision? Any logical purchase should be predicated on you deciding, independently, that you need a product first. Then, you should research the products and make an informed purchase. The infomerical flips this entire process. They get you to decide that you need THEIR product, and moreover that you should buy their product without any research or comparison shopping. Their half-hour spiel is touted as the research and comparison shopping ("these carbon steel chef's knives sell for 10 times more than our knives, and they can't cut through a penny!"). Turn off your teevee and stop buying this crap.

20. Anything on a Shopping Channel: See #19 above. Same deal. Shopping channels sell mediocre goods which you don't get to see up close. On TeeVee, they can make this stuff look good, but since you don't get the handle the goods yourself, you can never be sure. They use high pressure sales tactics ("only 10 left! This deal ends SOON! Call Now!") to encourage you to buy. And most of it is stuff that you had no intention of buying, but after an hour of watching, you get convinced it is a "deal". While working at UPS, the boxes from these home shopping channels (cheap boxes) would break open often, and I would get to see the merchandise and invoices. Most of the jewelry was costume jewelry worth little. And most of these shipments went to the same customers over and over again. People become ADDICTED to home shopping channels and squander thousands of dollars on this stuff. On the plus side, I never would have heard of such "precious" stones as "Tanzanite" if it were not for home shopping.

21. BUY GOVERNMENT AUCTION CARS FOR $50!: This scam is as old as the hills. They used to advertise in the Rolling Stone back in the 1970's, only back then it was Army Surplus Jeeps. My brother sent away the $5 money order for "more information" and in return received a mimeographed sheet that said, in effect, that if you want to buy an Army Surplus Jeep, you should call the Army and find out when and where they auction them off. They have updated the scam to list "Government DEA seized Drug Cars!!" which are probably sound more desirable to kids today. Does the government sell auctioned cars for $50? Yes, on occasion. But that is a car that caught fire and burned to a crisp. And you don't need to send these people money to find out where the auctions are. But even if you went to such an auction, chances are, there are few, if any deals to be had.

22. Auto Auctions: Buying a car under circumstances where you cannot inspect it or rationally think about pricing is ridiculous. Think about it. If you went to a used car dealer and they said "I'll sell you this car, but you have only 10 minutes to inspect it and 90 seconds to think about the price" you'd walk away and call the salesman a madman - or worse. Yet people buy cars at "auto auctions" all the time. Used car dealers routinely buy cars in bulk at wholesale auctions. However, these are usually not open to the public (you and me). Cars that go to wholesale auction are usually cars dealers take in trade that, for one reason or another, are not considered prime material for their own used-car lots. This is not to say they are junk all the time, only that they are rarely the prime choice cars. The cars sold at auto auctions open to the public are usually real junkers that even used car dealers shy away from. What a REAL DEAL in a used car? Buy one from the original owner (not some curbstoner) who took good care of it and has all service records. Private party sale car prices are usually 20-30% less than used car dealer sales prices and private party sale cars are in much better condition that any auction car.

23. Auctions in General: I've been to a number of auctions over the years. In most cases, I cannot point to any "bargains" I found, and in some cases, I was totally ripped off. To begin with, at an auction, you end up bidding sometimes on stuff you never had any intention of buying. You think "Oh, that's nice, I ought to have that" and you bid. But it is an impulse purchase, not a real need or desire for the item in question. Buying stuff on impulse, like all "shopping" is a really bad idea if you want to keep your finances in order. Auctioneers uses "shills" in the audience to make sure that nothing is sold for below market value or their predetermined set price. Once in a while, they let a piece go for cheap, usually to a shill, to get the crowd excited. But mostly, they sell for prices far over retail. Shills often work the crowd, acting as innocent bystanders and talking up the products. Many auctions these days are total come-ons for retail stores. They buy merchandise to auction off and then sell it at auction. One I recently went to consisted entirely of "antiques" manufactured in India and shipped over by the containerload. While they were not total garbage, they were far overpriced at auction. And nothing they were selling was anything I "needed" in the first place.

24. Rent to Own Furniture: These folks, like the pawn shops, paydayloans, and title pawn places, always proliferate in poor neighborhoods or near military bases. The premise is that you can rent, for a weekly fee, a television or other "desireable" consumer good, and have it now, and pay over time. They try to make it seem like a rational premise. One company even calls itself "Everybody Rents" as if to say that all the rich folks do this, why not you? Usually, this deal means paying even over consumer credit prices for goods of mediocre quality. You'd be better off using a credit card or household finance company instead. But these types of places prey upon the poor who have bad credit. You are far better off saving your cash and just buying what you really need at a big-box store somewhere else.

25. Freezer Scam: I have my hapless brother to thank for clueing me into this one. My poor brother managed to fall for nearly every scam there is. He is a rabid true believer! He went to work for a freezer scam place, working the phones in a "boiler room". He would call people and tell them he could sell them a whole side of beef, all cut up, for a very reasonable price - a price below retail in the supermarket. Some folks would bite on this hook. The catch was, where are you going to put a whole side of beef? Most folks don't have a freezer that large! So they sell you a freezer on installments for many times over its retail price. A fairly large freezer can be had for about the price of a similarly sized refrigerator. When you get done paying for the freezer and the electricity to run it, the "bargain" in the meat is long gone. My brother quit after a few months, as working in a telephone "boiler room" is no fun at all.

26. Unsolicited Phone Calls (Telemarketing Calls): #25 illustrates this next one. Anything sold through an unsolicited phone call is a bad proposition. Use the DO NOT CALL registry (http://www.donotcall.gov/) to put an end (mostly) to these calls. If someone calls you after you have registered with the registry, you KNOW they are a scam artist. Boiler room operators prey upon the elderly, who are often at home and tend to trust people. Perhaps this is a dying business in this day and age, with the internet and all, but I wouldn't count these folks out. Anything offered to you in an unsolicited phone call is something you didn't want in the first place (impulse shopping again) and is usually overpriced if not an outright rip-off. One sure way to tell if you are being scammed by a telemarketer is if they ask "How are you today?" right off the bat. This is from a script and designed to put you off and distract you - and gain your trust. As a polite person, you tend to want to respond with "fine, thank you" rather than "who the hell is this and what the frick do you want?" If you hear "How are you today?" just hang up.

27. Selling Vacuum Cleaners Door-to-Door (or buying them): Again, I have my brother to thank for educating me on this. After he left the freezer scam people, he answered a classified ad (see above) to sell vacuum cleaners door-to-door. The ad did not say that, of course, it said "management trainee" (a sure sign of a scam employment ad!). After a day-long seminar (see above) where religious-like training was instilled into the new hires (including singing the company song) they were sent out to sell the vacuum cleaners door-to-door. The product was not bad - in fact, it would be a decent product if they offered it in retail stores. But it was horribly overpriced - over $600 in 1980, which is a lot of money, even today. As you might imagine, most were sold in poor neighborhoods, usually on installments, which marked-up the price even further. Almost everything sold door-to-door is overpriced and not something you made a concious decision to purchase, research, and comparison shop.

28. eBay (or autotrader) seller scams: eBay can be a place to find a good bargain, althogh increasingly it is becoming just a place to find stuff at OK prices. It can be a good place for you to unload your own stuff, too. but beware, there are scammers out there. One scam is the phoney auction. The scammer advertises a desireable consumer item worth maybe $10,000 to $30,000 for less than half the price. Kubota tractors, Honde CBR 500 motorcycles, BMW 3-series cars, Harley Davidson Motorcycles, etc. are typical of the genre. The auction might ask you to contact them directly (their eBay e-mail is "broken") and mysteriously, the auction has only a few hours or a day left on it. You e-mail them, and they ask you to wire $5000 to the UK or Canada or somewhere overseas. They may tell you to send it with a "security password" so the money cannot be released until you receive the car, which they claim they will ship to you by 'air freight". Often there is a convoluted story about how the car belonged to a deceased brother or something. Usually there are glaring descrepencies between the picture of the car and the description as well. Yes, these are stupidly obvious rip-offs. Yes, hundreds, if not thousands of people fall for these every month. eBay tries to police them, but cannot be everywhere at once. The scammers are moving to Autotrader and other vehicle selling sites as a result of increased policing on eBay. If it sounds too convoluted and too good to be true, walk away. NEVER buy a car without seeing it in person first!

29. eBay (or AutoTrader) Buyer Scams (the Cashier's Check Scam): You decide to sell your car or boat on eBay and you get an e-mail. The buyer will pay your asking price, no questions asked, but wants the car shipped overseas. They will send you a money order or cashier's check for the full amont, plus $3000 in shipping. They ask you to wire the money to a 3rd party (usually in Canada or Africa) to pay the shipping. Two weeks later, you find out the cashier's check was a bad forgery and you are out the $3000 you wired overseas. And no, they are not interested in stealing your car, just your $3000, thank you. Again, if it sounds too good to be true (someone willing to buy your car at asking price, sight unseen, and willing to send you more than the asking price) then it probably IS too good to be true! Walk away.

30. Religious Scams (overseas): People of faith are often victims of scam artists. Again, belief is based on faith, which cannot be argued logically. As a result, belivers can be easily scammed. Some African scammers have ripped-off churches in America, asking for funds to build schools or pay for medical care. Usually, the appeals come by e-mail, but they can come by regular mail or ven a phone call or fax. Well-meaning Christians raise money for these worthy causes and send it overseas without much vetting of the destination of this lagress. Only later on (if ever) do they realize that the money they sent overseas bought someone a Mercedes and was not used to help prevent blindness amongst the orphans. Just because you are a Christian, doesn't mean you have to be a patsy as well.

31. Religious Scams (domestic): Again, it is easy to prey on the faithful. While many churches do much good in the world, there are a small number of churches that are little more than money-making operations for their founders. It is not hard to spot these churches - the founders are well dressed, wear lots of gold jewelry, and travel the world by private jet. Well, OK, I guess that describes the Pope, too. But at least he is the head of a huge world-wide operation. These scammers ask little old ladies, often through their teevee evangelistic hours, to tithe or pledge - often sums of money they can ill-afford to spend. Rather than send off money to a remote church on television, check our your local established churches and find out what the money they want goes to. You'd be better off giving money to a local church that sponsors youth groups, homeless shelters, and other support agencies in your area, than to buy some teevee pastor a new Rolls Royce.

32. Mailings that are faked-up to look like a government check or other official mailing: You've seen these, they have the statue of libery on the cover and look like a refund check. You open it up and its a credit card offer. When considering any product offer sent to you in a deceptive package, ask yourself this: What direction is aabusiness relationship founded on deception heading?

33. Patent Renewal Services: See #322 above. They send you a post card or letter that sounds like and looks like it is from the Government. For $110 they offer to "renew" your Patent. If you read the fine print, for the $110 fee they are agreeing to send you the form only. You can pay these fees online yourself at http://www.uspto.gov/ or download the form there for free. And the lowest maintenance fee (first) is well over $400 by now, besides.

34. Invention Brokers: They promise to patent your invention and make you millions. They use boiler room telephone techniques to pressure you into signing a contract with them for "only" $10,000 or so. The patent they obtain (if at all) is of limited or no value. Their "marketing" comprises little more than mailing brochures to a mailing list. They are NOT interested in stealing inventions. They will, however, keep your money.

35. TimeShare Resale services: If you bought a time share, you are a patsy, so why not victimize you yet again? They send you a letter saying they have a buyer for your timeshare and if you send them $500 they will hook you up. You send them $500 and your timeshare gets listed in a resale directory that may or may not be distributed to folks. Needless to say, there is not much of a resale market for these worthless "investments".

36. The Poetry Scam: They hit up little old ladies with this one. The America Poetry Authors Club Society or some such organization has heard all about your poems! They woudl like to publish your poem in an upcoming issue of their annual gazette! The catch is, you have to agree to buy X copies of this gazette at $200 apiece. You are, in effect, paying for publication of your poem. It has not been selected on its merits, only on your ability to pay. Note: There are legitimate poetry societies and clubs out there, but they don't ask for money up front like this.

37. The Electric Scooter Scam: You've seen the loud and obnoxious ads on TV (see above). You can get a FREE electric scooter (wheelchair) to drive around, and Medicare will pay for the whole thing! Just call now! However, if you read the FINE PRINT (see above) you'll realize that if you agree to this scam, and medicare doesn't pay for the scooter, then you are on the hook for the whole purchase price - often twice what the going rate for these things truly are. If you are having trouble walking, oftentimes walking is the best cure. A more sendentary life is not going to make your more active. And medicare doesn't pay for squat these days.

38. The OTHER Electric Scooter Scam: These are folks who sell two-wheeled electric scooters online for prices so low they are unbelievable! That's because they are fake prices. They take your money and.... no scooter!

39. LEASING a CAR: The ads on TV (see above) tout the GREAT DEALS you can get on leasing a new car. But if you read the FINE PRINT (see above) you'll realize that you are limited to less milage per year than is reasonable, and that all sorts of fees are due on signing, your trade-in is considered a "capital reduction" and when you turn the car in, you have to pay fines for scratches and "excess wear". After three years of car payments, you are WALKING. For the same three years of car payments, you could have bought the same car, secondhand, and own it free and clear by now.

40. EXTENDED WARRANTEES (Appliances): You buy a $200 television and they try to sell you an "extended warranty" for $39.95. Is it worth paying nearly 1/5 the price of the item for an additional year or two of "gurarantee"? Most modern electronics either fail during the initial warranty period (infant mortality) or last their expected lifetime. They are least likely to fail during the extended warranty period. You are better off just taking you chances. The most you will be out is $200!

41. EXTENDED WARRENTEES (Cars): After the initial warranty period is over, you get a card in the mail that appears to be from the car company (but is not) offering an extended warranty. If the company is an outright con, the warranty is worthless. Even the "legitimate" companies resist paying out claims, or require a byzantine procedure for filing claims that can never be complied with. Most cover things that NEVER wear out, like axles and crankshafts. They are hughely marked up by used car dealers. The best warranties are from the factory (manufacturer). But beware, even your new car dealer might try to sell you an extended warranty that is from some unknown third party that goes bankrupt a year later. If you buy an extended FACTORY warranty, make sure it is the real deal. A better bet is to put that money in the bank and save it for repairs down the road. At worst, you'll break even if something major goes wrong. If not, you'll come out way ahead.

42. Tax return loans: Paying 25% interest to get an advance on your tax return should be self-explanatory. If you can't wait a few weeks for the IRS to cut you a check, you have severe financial problems.

43. Cable Television: Cable TV is overpriced for what you get, and it is designed to keep you watching so they can sell your "eyeballs" to advertisers. You are PAYING to be advertised to. The people who are involved in Cable TV come from some colorful backgrounds and are not averse to questionable dealings. One of the all-time classic Cable TV con-jobs happened when Congress got into the action and decided to impose a cap on basic cable fees, becasue they were skyrocketing. Cable TV providers would have to provide "basic" cable service for a discounted flat fee. How did Cable respond? Simple. They raised all their rates by the "flat fee" and called it a "Government mandated fee increase". Nice touch! In addition, they took most of the former "basic" channels out of basic cable and made them part of a "tier 1" service that you'd have to pay extra for. You know, it takes real brass balls to take a law designed to LOWER Cable rates and spin it into a rate increase. If that isn't enough to make you vomit, consider this: When satellite dishes became popular in the 1980's, "concerned citizens" flocked to zoning board meetings to demand a ban on these "public eyesores". Of course, the "concerned citizens" were all employees of the cable companies. Now ask yourself this, why are you giving these guys $70 to $150 a month so you can get fatter and fatter and waste more and more of your time? Pull the plug on TeeVee, period - and live. Wealthy and effective people DO NOT watch television! The people who are ON TELEVISION do not watch television. That should be all you need to know.

44. Tax Protesters (or Tax Deniers): These folks sell seminars (see above) and books saying that you don't have to pay Federal Income tax, you know, because it is unconsititutional! They take words out of context, or quote parts of the tax code aimed at foreign corporations and then claim they apply to you. They don't. Federal tax is not "voluntary" and it has been held by the Supreme Court to be Constitional. Again, this is faith-based economics, based on BELIEF and not hard facts. They make a lot of money selling you books and seminars - a lot of money out of your MISERY. I had a friend try this scam. Smart guy, too, or so I thought. Yes, both the Federal and State tax authorities came after him and put a lien on his house and garnished his wages. Two things are unavoidable in life, death and taxes. You can wish both away all you want, they both still come due.

45. PONZI Schemes: A Ponzi scheme is one in which the con artist promises investors huge returns on their money - 20%, 30%, 50% or more. He takes in investments and after a few months pays off the initial investors with dividends equal to 25% of their money. WOW! What a great return on your investment! But the money paid out is just part of what is now coming in. The "satisfied investors" stories are used to con more people into the deal. Eventually, the whole thing collapses, as it is a pyramid scheme (see above) and once people stop investing, no "dividends" can be paid out. These schemes go back decades, if not a century or more. Yet new ones pop up even today. People are still greedy and willing to believe anything that defies the law of economic gravity.

46. LOTTERY TICKETS: Buying a lottery ticket once or twice a year is never going to bankrupt you. However, many poor folks purchase these tickets $20 at a time. The smaller "scratch and win" cards prey upon people's need to gamble. They "win" a free ticket or a dollar or two just often enough to make it seem like they might make money at it. In the long run, the law of probability is inflexible. For every dollar you put into the lottery, you might get out 10 cents. If you keep playing long enough, you'll lose every dollar you put in.

47. GAMBLING: They prefer to call it "Gaming" as that doesn't sound so bad. But it is bad, and can ruin lives, marriages, and families. It is hugely profitable and organized crime is inevitably involved. Again, the law of probability rules supreme. If you take $100 into a Casino, you are going to come out with less, perhaps nothing. Talk all you want about free drinks and "compted" meals - you paid for those "freebies" many times over. Gamblers will regale you with tales of "hitting the jackpot" but live in denial about the tens of thousands of dollars they have frittered away over the years (if not hundreds of thousands). If you can't understand why Gambling with money is a really bad idea, you are a moron or just trying to be deceptive, PERIOD.

48. Home Refinancing: It is hard to even get a mortgage these days. But back in the day, mortgage brokers, particularly those on the internet, would offer to refinance your home and reduce your monthly payment. Sounds like a good deal, until you realize you've just added several years to the term of your mortgage, increased the balance of your mortgage to pay all their "garbage fees" and moreover their lower monthly payment is only part of a "teaser rate" that will double in a few years, forcing you out of your own home. How many people are now paying the ultimate price for THIS con?

49. Perpetual Going-Out-Of-Business Sales: I lived in Alexandria Virginia for 20 years. The whole time I was there, there was a rug merchant who was running a FINAL! GOING OUT OF BUSINESS SALE! For 20 years. Nothing in his store was a particular bargain. He did the usual rug merchant trick of trying to sell synthetic fiber machine made carpets at hand-loomed wool prices. Again, any business deal predicated on a LIE (they are going out of business perpetually) is sure to lead nowhere. If they lie to you from the get-go, chances are they are screwing you later on.

50. Particle Board Furniture Sold on Installments: You've seen their LOUD advertisements on the TV (see above). You've seen their fine print ads in the newspaper (see above). Acme Furnture warehouse is having a weekend blowout going-out-of-busness sale! You go to the warehouse and they have all sorts of shiny furniture - most of it gaudy stuff that looks more at home in a bordello, but that poor people think looks "rich". It is cheaply made of particle board and far overpriced. The dealer offers high interest rate financing (and gets a cut of that action as well). Oftentimes by the time the loans are paid off, the furniture has delaminated and is falling apart. Suprisingly, many folks go back to the same dealer and buy new furniture and start over again, having learned nothing. Quality furniture can last a lifetime. And you have a lifetime to accumulate it, so don't feel the need to furnish your house all at once and go into debt.

51. Health discount plans - these are not health insurance, and are usually sold over the phone by telemarkers who may or may not be upfront with whether they are in fact not a health insurance plan. One site boldly prints that they are NOT health insurance, and by the way, fees paid are NOT refundable. So if you sign up and change your mind, too bad! Discount fees can be had by purchasing regular health insurance, even if you have a high deductable. For the dollars spent on a "discount" plan, you'd be better off spending it on a traditional health insurance plan. Most of these plans are sold by folks who "buy in" to become "work at home" salespeople. Can you make money selling these plans? Perhaps, but you'll have to find a lot of gullible people to make much.

52. Pre-paid legal services plans: Again, these are not necessarily fraudulent, but do you really need them? Consider that most people will never consult with an attorney in their lifetime, and you are paying a lot of money over the years for something you may never need. One of these services approached me, asking if I wanted to be part of their plan. However, the amount they paid for services was so low that I could not imagine making any money at it. Put your money in the bank into a savings plan. If you need money for a lawyer, you'll have it. If you don't need a lawyer (more likely than not) you'll have the money. Most of these plans are sold by folks who "buy in" to become "work at home" salespeople. Can you make money selling these plans? Perhaps, but you'll have to find a lot of gullible people to make much.

53. ANYTHING with a "negative option" cancellation policy: You sign up for a service, such as internet access, and they want to bill your credit card for the service. IN order to cancel, you have to call them and cancel. You call, they don't cancel, and surprise, they have no record of your earlier call. In some instances, you have to cancel your credit card to get them to stop billing you. Another twist is the "3 months free trial" - which of course, requires a credit card number to activate. If you fail to cancel the "free trial" during a certain time window, they charge your card for the full three months and then continue to charge forever. Granted, some services do require credit card billing. But shy away from using anything that requires credit cards as the only form of payment. Some savvy people online use a separate "throwaway" credit card for such services - one that can be cancelled and discarded if an on-line provider doesn't take "NO" for an answer.

54. Credit Repair Scams: These folks claim that they can "repair" bad credit. In reality, they are usually trying to get you to borrow more money, at high interest rates to consolidate debt, or for a fee, they claim they can make repairs to your credit record. The only "repairs" you can make to your credit record are ones you can make yourself. Save your money, or use it to get out of debt. There is no magic bullet to repairing bad credit.

55. Credit Monitoring or Protection Scams: For a monthly fee, they claim they will monitor your credit or protect you from "identity theft" which is a largely overstated phenomenon. You are already protected from most of these risks by ordinary credit card protections. The additional amount spent, over time, would be better spent on investment or paying down debt.

56. Your Free Credit Score: You can get a REALLY free credit score at: https://www.annualcreditreport.com/cra/index.jsp. But the "free" credit reports hyped online require you to sign up for a credit monitoring service for $10 a month - or more. Forgetabout these come-on websites. Get the real deal - you are entitled to it under the law.

57. Mortgage Life Insurance: If you get a mortgage or refinance your house, you'll get solicitations in the mail from companies offering to "insure" your mortgage, so if you die, the balance of the mortgage will be paid off. All for only a few dollars a day! The problem with this coverage is that it is very expensive for the coverage involved. You can buy a term policy for a half-million dollars for far less - and such a policy will not decline in payoff over time.

58. Auto Loan Insurance: Same deal as Mortgage Life Insurance but an even bigger rip-off. For a "few dollars a month" you are buying a life policy with a term of 36-72 months (the term of your loan) with a declining balance as time progresses. For the cost of one of these policies, you could easily buy $100,000 in real life insurance. And besides, once you're dead, who cares about your car payments?

59. Fake Charities: They appeal to you by phone (telemarketing call) and may have similar-sounding names to real charities. Or they appeal by mail, internet, or on the television. One of the latest scams is to use your own neighbors to "fundraise" for you. They get your neighbor sucked into the scam, and then get them to solicit donations from you as well. A fake charity can be distinguished from the "real" deal in that the fake ones spend only a token amount on the charity, with the bulk being spent on "fundrasing" and "overhead". In other words, someone is drawing a nice salary from your donation, but that's about it. There is little way for the average person to distinguish from fake and real charities without a lot of legwork. The best solution is to find a charity you think is worthy, research it, and then donate to that charity with money, like donations, and your time. When others call or knock on the door, you can say "No" to them with a clear conscience.

60. Employment Scams: In addition to Work-at-home scams and other classified ad scams, another employment scam also exists. These promise a job interview with a good company for a high-paying job. The problem is, they want you to fly out there on your own ticket for the interview. Instead of asking you to fly out and get reimbursed, or sending you a ticket, they ask you to send them money so they can buy the ticket, and then promise to repay you once you show up. Needless to say, this is not a standard way of doing business with most companies. Most companies will buy the ticket and mail it to you, or tell you to buy your own ticket and then reimburse you. No legitimate company asks for cash money from you in advance in order to conduct a job interview, period.

61. The Hot Tub and Pool Table Store: In every major metropolitan area, there is a store, usually in the suburbs, selling hot tubs and pool tables. They advertise heavily on the television and radio and offer "low, low prices" on hot tubs and pool tables. When you ask what the price is, they say "$99 amonth!". They want you to finance the purchase through expensive consumer financing (20-30% interest) which they get a "taste" of as well. Hot Tubs and Pool Tables are not very expensive items - they certainly don't cost as much as a car, that's for sure. But after you've made all the payments, you could have bought an inexpensive car for the same amount. Walk away from these "deals" and look for the same item lightly used or from a legitimate dealer or store. Chances are, you'll pay HALF of what the loud-ad place charges. We bought a brand new hot tub from a lady who ran a business out of a storage locker. I think we paid $2500 for it. That was 12 years ago and it still runs great. The Scam place wanted $6500 for the same tub, but offered low, low monthly payments. Buying anything based on monthly payment is a bad, bad idea.

62. RV shows and Boat Shows: Along these lines are the RV and Boat shows. Imagine getting people to PAY to go look at consumer goods. Ridiculous idea, right? Yet people do, every year in every town. And dealers show up to hawk their wares, with "Show Specials" that encourage you to "BUY NOW!!!" because the laws of physics dictate that the price has to go up after the show is over, right? People look at Boats and RVs and think they are expensive items and overpay for them. They also don't think about where they are going to store them or how they are going to use them. They just seem so nice at the show. It is a common story one hears in the RV and boat business - "I bought it at the show, and we used it twice and didn't like it". Now they owe more on it than it is worth and can't unload it. Skip the shows, or, if you go, leave your checkbook and credit cards behind and just LOOK. Research big-ticket purchases like this over time, and look at the prices of secondhand units, if nothing else but to give you an idea of how rapidly these things depreciate.

63. Free $250 Gift Card! Again, one wonders why people continue to believe you can get something-for-nothing. The sites that promote these "free gift cards" ask you to take an online survey (usually just for appearance sake) and then to sign up for one or more (usually three) online offers from participating advertisers. These services are charged to your credit card (or your phone bill) and are difficult, if not impossible, to cancel. The free gift card is often slow in coming (the rules usually state you must sign up for the bogus services for at least 30 days) if they come at all. If someone offers you something for "free", chances are it has no value to begin with, or it is an outright scam. Just walk away.

64. Anything Advertised in the Smithsonian Magazine: I get this magazine as a gift subscription, and while the quality of the articles has improved somewhat in recent months, the advertisments in the magazine are nothing short of scandalous. Targeted at the older set, these ads, which are made to look like articles (with the word "advertisement" in small letters) sell everything from cheap watches to non-collectable collector coins, all at inflated prices. Again, any business transaction predicated on a LIE is going nowhere but SOUTH. So an advertisment for coins from "The Gov't Mint" (always "Gov't" never "Government") that is made to look like an article is based on a minor deception to begin with. So do you think the deal is legitimate? Just as many older people believe that anything advertised on television is "vetted" by the stations or networks, many older people trust magazines (like Smithsonian and others) that the advertisements are for quality and reasonably priced products. However, other than culling out the outright frauds (people who take your money and give you nothing in return) most magazines do little to police or screen their advertisers, simply because they can't afford to lose the ad revenue. Buyer beware!

65. Sell Your Car For You Scam (Craig's List): If you list yoru car for sale on Craig's list (and increasingly, Auto Trader) you may get an unsolicited phone call from a fellow in Nevada offereing to help you sell your car for you. They make verbal promises about markeing your car on a number of websites, offering links to financing, and helping you "price" your vehicle. The catch is, of course, they want as much as $500 up front, which is a lot of money for the resale of any car. And guess what? Once you send this fellow your money, you'll never hear from him again. If you really want to sell the car, lower the price by $500 instead. It it ain't selling, try adding better pictures and description, and then lowering your price slightly. Check the private party resale values (not dealer retail) on kbb.com nadaguides.com and edmunds.com to make sure you are being realistic. The used car business is in the tank right now, so cars are hard to sell unless priced right.

66. The White Van Speaker Scam: Two young guys offer to sell you a pair of high-quality speakers or a home theater system for an astonishingly small amount of money - inferring that they may in fact be stolen. They claim to be deliverymen, and the warehouse "over-ordered" them. The system is worth only $20 to $50 (if that) and you end up with useless garbage that you overpaid for. The Police tell you to take a hike. You are out $200 to $500. See my other posting on this subject as well.

67.  New Credit Repair Scam:  There is a new credit repair scam that promises desperate people that they can "get out from under" debts.  These con artists ask for several thousand dollars up front, and then tell you to stop paying your bills, and instead to pay them and put the money in "escrow".  The theory is, the creditors will eventually sell off the debt to collection agencies, who in turn will accept pennies on the dollar for the debt, which the "escrow" will pay.  But of course, this destroys your credit rating and you may end up getting sued and going bankrupt. And you may end up having wages garnished (which could cause you to lose your job) or a lien put on your house.  The agency keeps your money, of course. And now you are bankrupt, unemployed, homeless, and have no credit whatsoever.

68.  Free Energy Audits:  You register with the Federal Do Not Call Registry, to eliminate pesky telemarketer calls.   Someone calls you anyway, and claims they are not a telemarketer, and are not subject to the Do Not Call act.  The are lying.  They say or imply they are from the Government and you are entitled to free money or they can cut your energy bill in half "and wouldn't you like that?"  They offer to do a home "energy audit", but are selling overpriced insulation or storm windows.  Just hang up - they are violating the Do Not Call law, so you know they have no scruples, whatsoever.

69.  Robo-Calls Concerning Credit Cards:   Sometimes they make a robo-call, purporting to be from the "Card Services" or a Credit Card Company (they guess at your card company name, and if you bite, they win).   They say your card was stolen, will you please provide the card number, name on the card, expiration date and security code as "verification" that they are speaking to the right person?  Yup, scam. Or they say they can offer you a discounted interest rate (well below even the lowest rates available) on a Credit card.  Press "9" for more information!  And then they will ask for your existing card number to "roll over" the balance to the new card!  They just steal your credit card information and leave you with nothing.

70.  Cramming & Slamming:  In the old days, people used to call and get you to say the word "Yes" which they would then record and then "slam" you to an expensive long-distance service, which you might not notice until the next billing cycle.  Some companies were fined heavily for this.  Others attempt to "cram" services onto your phone bill, for example, by saying they will pay you for a survey or say you have to sign up for the service to enter a contest  - but can cancel within 30 days! (negative option - good luck with that).  Call your carrier and ask them to lock your long-distance provider and to lock out any cramming services.  These should be free services.  And read your bill carefully - you have 30 days to contest slammed services.

71.  Free Puppy Scam:   This is a variation on the Craigslist and eBay scams, where they advertise a non-existent product at an unreasonably low price.  You contact the seller and they give you a long-winded story about leaving the country or whatever, and offer to ship you the $2500 purebred puppy for "free", provided you wire them $400 by Western Union.  You wire them the money, and that is the last you hear from them.    Never wire anything by Western Union, ever, ever, ever!

72. Check Cashing Stores:   If you are "unbanked" a helpful check cashing store will offer to cash your paycheck or other check for you for a fee of $25 to $30.   This is idiotic.  It takes only minutes to set up an account with a real bank, or to cash your paycheck at the bank that issues it.   Paying 10% to cash your paycheck is a ripoff.   And no, it is not just illegal immigrants doing this - many poor folks are afraid of banks.



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Now some of you are saying, "Gee, isn't this list kind of harsh? Maybe there IS a good deal on time shares out there! My cousin Ned made money on a Candy Route! And maybe that Russian Viagra site won't steal my credit card number!" Maybe. Maybe. But I doubt it. If you are so predisposed to BELIEVE in these sort of things, you are Grade A prime meat for these con-artists.

And the real "true believers" out there will never heed good advice - they will keep falling victim to scam after scam, and never learn from their mistakes.

Most of these scams have a number of things in common:

1. The "something for nothing" mentality: The idea that somehow you can make money without working or adding value to the process. People who don't understand money always fall for this. TANSTAAFL! There Ain't No Such Thing As A Free Lunch! Remember that.

2. High pressure sales pitches: Buy now or lose a good deal forever! Cons do not want people to think over an investment, or worse yet, consult with friends and family who will point out the obvious flaws in the deal and flaws in their thinking.

3. Relying on people's misunderstanding of how money works or what it is: Some folks think money is like the weather. Some days it pours and other days you have a drought. Where money comes from and how some folks end up with more is a mystery to them. To them, some folks are "lucky" and get rich, and other folks (themselves) are "unlucky" and are poor. Their actions have nothing to do with their situation, in their minds.

4. Preying upon the Greed of the Mark: "All good cons prey upon the Greed of the Mark" (A quote from the movie The Sting). The "Mark" is the victim, and if you can get the victim to believe that somehow HE is the one ripping YOU off, then you can fleece him all day long and he'll never even know he's been had until it is too late.

5. Business Deals Predicated on a LIE: They use a deceptive envelope, phone call, e-mail, or "sale" to get your interest or get their foot in the door. Having lied to you once, don't act all surprised when they lie to you again and again. Just walk away from deceptive people. They've played their card right up front. You have only yourself to blame in thinking that you can outwit them.

Making wise purchases and managing your money means avoiding the temptation of the something-for-nothing mentality or the "I have to have it NOW!" mentality. Over-hyped products and services are usually never worth what they are asking for them. Financial decisions, including purchasing, have to be made in a calm and collected manner - if you want to accumulate wealth rather than squander it.

Friday, December 5, 2008

Beware of Financial Gurus

 Suze "Sooze" Orman on her new Yacht.  The financial advice business is working out well - for her.  How's it working out for you?

I have posted a number of things here in the hope that someone might find some good advice or at least an idea or two. I don't get paid for these postings and don't expect to get paid.

There are, unfortunately, a lot of financial "Gurus" out there who, while sometimes giving good advice, often have an agenda of their own - and often can be bought.

For example, Suze Orman is one such Guru. Initially, she made her fame and fortune dispensing some pretty basic common sense sound advice. Don't spend more than you make. Borrowing is never a good idea. Don't try to keep up with the Joneses. That sort of thing.

One piece of good advice she gave was that when it came to cars, you should buy a decent car and hang onto it forever. Leasing, she said, was never a good idea. She touted her old BMW 7-series that she bought a decade ago and now had over 100,000 miles on it. Sound advice.

But then... General Motors hired her as a spokesperson, and hey, waddya know? Check out those deals on new Buicks! She sold out to the man. See:


And of course today, she is now a spokesperson for Sea Ray boats.  Wonder where that is going to go...

Orman has also leveraged her "Common Sense" financial advice into a small industry of books, kits, seminars, radio and television shows. One person who has definitely benefited from Orman's financial advice is...Orman.

This is not to say she has nothing worthwhile to say. It is just, as I have said all along, you cannot SPEND YOUR WAY TO WEALTH. So when Orman or others suggest you BUY a book or kit or whatever from them to help you with your finances, you should think about the irony of that proposition. Check the book out from the library instead. It's free, there.

Besides, the advice in these books is pretty much common sense, as I have laid out here. There is no free lunch. You can't have it all and not be deeply in debt. You are better off living with less and living in peace than keeping up with your neighbors and living in debt. Basic stuff, really.

In the supermarket the other day, I saw a book entitled "Total Money Makeover" by Dave Ramsey. I thumbed through the book and thought a lot of what he had to say was good advice. Again, most of it is common sense.

I visited his website and like Orman, it is more of the same. Buy my book. Attend my seminar. Send me money, period. Giving financial self-help advice is a great way to help yourself to someone Else's finances.

One troubling aspect of the Ramsey website was its religious slant. I was a bit shocked at this at first. I have nothing against religion, which can be a healthy influence for some people. But for the financially strapped, this comment from his website gave me pause:

"As a Christian, you probably know that you’re called to tithe. That means one-tenth of your income – off the top and before anything else – should go to your church. Beyond that, anything you give is an offering, which is over and above the tithe."

If everyone in the world gave 10% to churches, the churches would be astoundingly wealthy. Provided the churches are doing good with this money (running a homeless shelter or soup kitchen) and not evil (buying pastor Smarmy a new Gulfstream Jet and Rolls Royce) there is nothing wrong with tithing per se.

Nevertheless, I believe that if you are severe financial difficulty, you should consider paying yourself first before you open your pocketbook to your church. And you should know where the money is being spend when you give it to them. Some churches are little more than scams to collect money tax-free.

(And if you think about it, shop around.  There are other religions that don't require tithing or ask for a lot less than 10%.  You shop for the lowest price on gas.  Why not on salvation?  Or just cut to the chase and realize that organized religion is a sham and that God hates it.)

Ramsey's books and seminars make sense in a way. Christian churches are probably suffering from lack of collections when their parishioners are strapped for cash. Better to pay 10% to the church than to pay 10% to Citibank.

There is also some criticism of Ramsey's financial advice as well.

See also:


All in all, I think these Gurus mean well, but they do manage to turn common-sense advice into a wildly profitable business.

Save your money on Guru books. Check them out at the library. Or just...use your common sense.

Vehicle Madness - Knowing When to Unload

There comes a time when you should sell a vehicle - if you are no longer using it.  Many men, in particular, hang on to equipment far longer than they should.


You will note in my articles I do concentrate a lot of maintaining and owning vehicles. In the United States, a country with 300 million people and 330 million cars, owning a car or other vehicle is a common occurrence. Unfortunately, for many people, it can also be a black hole for money.

One big problem is that people don't hang onto their vehicles long enough - particularly their primary transportation vehicle. Many folks trade and sell their cars every two to three years, and end up paying top dollar for their transportation needs (by paying all that depreciation).

At the other end of the spectrum, there are folks who hang onto vehicles too long, usually out of pride. And in many cases, these are vehicles that are for recreational or hobby use, such as boats or recreational vehicles, which can cost an enormous amount of money. Not properly cared for, such vehicles and drop in value to near zero in a matter of months.

This article is addressed toward the latter problem.

To counteract this problem, I created a simple financial rule: If you have not used a vehicle in six months, and have no bona fide intent to use the vehicle in the next six months, sell it, period. The depreciation (and neglect) of a year or more will more than counteract the transaction costs involved. If you decide a year later you need such a vehicle, you can easily purchase a similar one to use.

The problem many folks have with vehicles is that they believe theirs is something unique or special. They hang onto their old car, boat, jet-ski, or motor home, convinced that "not many were made in that color" or that it is somehow otherwise collectible. Nothing could be further from the truth. These types of things are made on an assembly line, and every few minutes another one pops off. Whoops, there goes another one. And another. And another.

Even "collectible" cars that are no longer in production are readily obtainable. Old muscle cars from the 1960's were made in the millions, and hundreds of thousands are still on the roads or in garages. If you sell one, chances are, you can buy the same, or similar car, down the road, for about the same amount of money (plus inflation). Hemings motor news is full of such cars for sale, month after month. They are not as "rare" as you would think.

However, the problem I am referring to here is not directed at Jay Leno and his car collection, or any other serious car collector who has a garage full of meticulously restored cars kept under dust covers. I am referring to the average middle-class Joe or Jane, who has a boat, or car, or RV, that ends up being a financial nightmare, because they don't sell when they should.

The following examples illustrate why my six month rule makes a lot of sense:

1. Joe wanted a boat to go fishing in with the wife and also take trips. Driving to work every day, he saw a boat parked by the side of the road with a "for sale" sign on it. Buying anything because you drive by it every day is the worst way to go about it, by the way. If you decide you must have a boat, RV, or motorcycle, research them thoroughly, and then go out and look at a dozen or more. Impulse buying something because you see it every day is never a good idea.

Joe paid too much for the boat because he didn't do the research. It was an older boat and old boats can be a nightmare of repairs. To him, however, it looked impressive - all those electronics (outdated) and features (mostly broken) and that big engine (in need of an overhaul). So he paid the asking price and towed it home.

For the first year, he and his wife used the boat a bit. His wife wanted a smaller runabout, not a cabin cruiser, and she was not happy with the purchase. They used the boat less and less. Eventually, they stopped using the boat entirely. It sat on its trailer for a year in the yard, gathering leaves and mildew.

Joe tried selling it, but convinced the boat was worth a fortune, he turned down several offers - offers that were at or above the NADA "book" value for the boat. Joe told me "It has been my experience that what something is worth is what someone are willing to pay for it," which of course, makes no sense at all. Joe was certain that the "right person" would come along and pay him the same price for the boat that he had paid. There is a shortage of such people in the world, however. Pride prevented him from taking a hit and moving on. After sitting for two years, Joe decided that if he couldn't "get his price" for the boat, he'd take it out for a spin.

The results were predictable. Boats and other machinery do not like to SIT for long periods of time without use. Engines seize, wood rots, and rust, decay, mildew, mold and algae get all over everything. The boat died on his first trip out, and now needed a whole new engine. Joe ended up scrapping the boat after he realized that the cost of a new engine and other repairs would exceed the book value of the boat. Also, the boat market had collapsed along with the economy.

If Joe had sold the boat when he first stopped using it, when he got good offers for it, he could have banked that money and later on, if he decided to start boating again, he could have bought a similar boat with the money he got from selling the old one. As it worked out, Joe ended up with nothing.

Note that Joe's problem is one that MEN in particular seem to have a lot. They believe that "giving up" on their hobby, be it airplanes, motorcycles, RV's, boats, or whatever, is somehow giving up on their life or giving away some part of their masculinity. As we get older, having a lot of "toys" gets to be more of a burden than a pleasure. I for one, will be quite content on the day I give up my boat and RV. I will have had my fill and be ready to move on, with no regrets that I am leaving anything "behind." Life is finite, and there is no sense wasting it trying to "hang on" to an earlier era in your life.

2. Suzie and James went to the boat show. Boat shows and RV shows are fun to go to, if all you do is LOOK at the wares. NEVER, EVER buy a boat or RV at a show. To begin with, buying any of these things brand new is the worst way to go about it. And as we shall see, the people with the most problems with these "toys" often buy them at shows.

Anyway, Suzie and James saw a cute runabout on a trailer at the show. Living near a lake, they thought it would be fun for the whole family to go boating, particularly after watching a video of a fun family enjoying a day at the lake. So they signed the papers and bought the boat on installments. They had never boated before, so they had no idea of what they were doing or how much a boat like that was worth. It seemed like a bargain, all shiny and new - for less than the cost of a new car! They paid too much for the boat.

They took the boat out once on the lake. Trailering a boat is never easy, as you have to get up early on the weekend, fight the lines at the boat ramp, launch the boat, and then schlep all your gear onto and off the boat. Once they got out on the water, they didn't know what to do. It was a windy day, and the boat slammed the waves. Suzie didn't enjoy this, and the kids, sitting in the back and getting wet, got restless and antsy. It wasn't like in the brochure, where family harmony reigned, and everyone went swimming and had a picnic! A major family argument and meltdown ensued. Discouraged, they headed back to shore and brought the boat home, never to use it again.

Suzie and James knew nothing about boats. So they didn't realize that their stern drive needed to be winterized to prevent the engine water jacket from freezing. The first winter, the engine block cracked, although they didn't know that. The boat filled with dead leaves and brown water, and the battery went dead. One trailer tire went flat. Suzie and James could barely make the boat payments, with the expenses of raising a family and all, so paying to winterize, maintain, and store the boat were out of the question. They thought they could "afford" the boat, but failed to take into account the regular maintenance expenses.

More disturbingly, they were "upside down" on the boat - they owed nearly $15,000 on the boat and the day they bought it, it was worth only $12,000 due to depreciation. After three years sitting in their yard, the boat was worth little more than scrap value - perhaps a thousand or two. It needed a new interior, new engine, new battery, new trailer tires, new everything. Other than the trailer frame and the hull, the boat was toast, all from stupidity and neglect. Ironically, Suzie and Frank were both college graduates - James with an advanced degree. They were not dumb people, they just chose not to educate themselves about a very expensive purchase.

For a young working couple, it was a $15,000 mistake. However they could have bailed out early on if they had sold the boat after their first disastrous outing - and taken only the $3000 hit in depreciation. The problem is, Suzie and James didn't have $3000 in the bank to pay the difference between the sales price of the boat and the amount owed on the loan - so selling it was literally impossible for them. They thought they could "afford" the boat in terms of monthly installments, but failed to think about the larger picture. After five years, they paid off the boat loan and donated the now derelict hull and trailer to a local charity for a tax write-off.

Such a waste. A brand new boat, with only hours on the engine, completely destroyed through ignorance. And the damage to their bank account!

Now, multiply this story times a million or more, and you'll understand why throughout America, there are derelict boats and RVs parked in yards in every neighborhood. Suzie and James' story is not unique by any means.


3. Hank was retired and wanted the boat of his dreams. He bought a 40 foot Sea Ray, a monster of a boat, for $200,000 in 1985. When brand new, it was quite a ride. All shiny and sporty. He and his wife toured the canals of South Florida and visited restaurants along the Intracoastal waterway. For the first few years, it was fun. Hank's wife, however, was not comfortable taking the boat out into the ocean or rough water. Hank went out fishing a few times with friends, but it was not as satisfying as he thought it would be. They never took the boat on the long trips they talked about.

The boat started getting used less and less. Like about half the boats in any given marina, it rarely, if ever, left the dock. Hank would stop by and "tinker" with it on weekends, noting, with despair, that yet some other item on the boat needed fixing or had fallen into disrepair. The boat was no longer shiny and new after a decade in the Florida sun, and it was hopelessly out of style as well.

He thought about selling it, and even talked to a boat broker. The broker told him that in the present condition the boat was in, it would fetch maybe $20,000 or so. Hank was infuriated! He had paid $200,000 for the boat! It was worth at least half that, right? Hank's problem with perceived value of an object versus its market value, is something that we will see is quite common.

Hank decided that he would get back into boating. He had the boat hauled and the engines worked over. He installed a new generator and air conditioning, on the premise that his wife would use the boat more often if the outside area (under canvas) was air conditioned as well as the below decks. He spent over $30,000 on repairs and upgrades.

He took the boat out again with his wife, and discovered that she still didn't like boating with him. After they had seen every inch of every canal in South Florida and visited every restaurant, they realized that they had "done that" and it was no longer of interest. And the cost of fuel was staggering. As they got older, schlepping stuff on and off the boat got to be more of a chore, and boating was no longer fun. They had outgrown boating. It was time to quit.

So Hank put the boat up for sale again, slashing his "asking" price to $80,000. After all, he had just "invested" $30,000 in it, right?

What Hank failed to realize is that there are a lot of hoary old boats out there for sale, and his was nothing special. The $30,000 in maintenance was just that - maintenance that is required for depreciating assets like a boat. Maintaining the boat did not make it worth more than any other well-maintained boat. And his boat still had numerous "issues" including a funky mildew smell below decks and many small broken things, as well as torn canvas and seats, faded fiberglass, and a generally derelict appearance.

Boats like Hank's eventually end up getting sold - when the owner dies. When Hank passed away, his wife sold the boat to a dealer for a few thousand dollars. In addition to the money lost by such a "fire sale" price, Hank's widow was out all the money Hank had wasted in trying to "upgrade" the boat, as well as the monthly maintenance and storage fees Hank had paid over the last decade or so.

Again, as I noted in my article on Hobbies (see Hobbies Run Amok), it is quite possible, and in fact, LIKELY that you will outgrow a hobby over time. Boating loses its allure over time, and you should be prepared for the "end game" of any hobby, whether it be boating, RV'ing or motorcycling (the latter being the worst in this regard, as "die hard" bikers refuse to give up their rides until far too late, oftentimes with fatal results).


4. Henry wanted a motor home - not just any motor home, but a Bluebird Wanderlodge motorhome. He bought one brand new from a local dealer for $200,000, which was a lot of money back in the 1980's. After a few years, he "traded up" to a newer model, spending yet more money on a 1987 model.

Fast-forward 20 years and the once-new motorhome is now a pile of rust. Henry parked it at an RV park in Florida, where the salt air attacked the unique steel chassis and body of these cult-classic motorhomes. After it had sat for a few years, Henry tried to start it. The piston rings on one cylinder (the one with the open intake valve) had rusted to the block, and the engine needed a total rebuild.

Henry, like most of the folks in these stories (and many, many others) seemed to believe that a motorhome or boat or whatever was an investment, not a depreciating asset. Moreover, Henry foolishly believed that you could just "park" a complex mechanical object like this, and without any maintenance or service, it would not degrade or decay over time. Storing boats and RV's requires some work to help reduce (but not entirely prevent) the degradation that occurs over time. Keeping them INDOORS is the best way. Once left to the elements, they deteriorate quickly.

Henry had the motorhome towed to a dealer, and the diesel engine was overhauled. New batteries were installed and six new Michelin bus tires were mounted. The total bill was over $20,000. Henry decided to drive the coach "up north" and discovered, to his dismay, that it seemed harder to handle than it used to. Of course, part of the problem, in addition to the worn-out suspension, was that Henry was over 80 now, and driving such a large coach was a lot harder to do at that age.

Henry decided to sell the coach, asking a modest $80,000 for the rig - despite the fact that most rigs of such age - in pristine condition - sold for less than half that. After paying storage fees for two years, Henry dropped the price to $40,000. Finally, he let the dealer take it on consignment for $20,000.

Unfortunately, the rig was worth maybe $5000 - about its scrap value. One could pull and sell the rebuilt motor, wheels and tires and sell some components to other Wanderlodge owners and sell the body for an easy $1500 in scrap metal. But to restore the coach to its former glory would cost tens of thousands of dollars - and better coaches could be had for far less than that. It was the end-game for this once proud "Bird".

Henry would hear nothing of it. The coach was a steal at 20 grand and that was that. Like Hank's boat example above, the coach sat for a few more years and finally was sold when Henry died. The widow sold it to the dealer for a pittance. The dealer quickly sold it on eBay for a pittance and a penny.

Again, the mistakes Henry made were trying to "resuscitate" a dying vehicle, much as Hank tried to do with his Sea Ray. He spend tens of thousands of dollars "repairing" something that was not worth repairing. Like Hank, he refused to see that the value of the object, as determined by the many book values (NADA guides, Kelly Blue Book) was far less than he thought. And like Hank, his widow ended up selling the boat for nothing after it was all said and done.

Henry should have realized that with advancing age, eventually one has to give up on large complex vehicles and that it's OK to do so. Rather than spend tens of thousands of dollars trying to bring back the past, Henry should have sold the coach once he stopped driving it and bought a trailer for his Florida RV park. If you are going to park an RV in a trailer park for years on end, buy a trailer instead of a motorhome. They are much cheaper to buy and less complicated to maintain.

* * * *

These examples illustrate why it is a very good idea to buy something secondhand first, before you decided to commit from a hobby. When I say secondhand, however, I do NOT mean from Hank, Henry, Joe, or Suzie and Frank. I've seen, firsthand, the Boats, RVs, Cars, and other vehicles from these "time wasters" who think their clapped-out pieces of garbage are worth as much as a new unit in pristine condition.

I've driven hours to check out a boat that the owner said was "pristine", only to arrive and find that the engines are nearly shot, the boat is covered in bird poop, and the hull is covered with barnacles and algae. When I tell the owner that their POS boat is a load of junk, they get angry - their boat is a BARGAIN at only $10,000 OVER book value!

Why folks harbor these delusions is beyond me. To some extent, I guess it might sometimes work. Some "chump" (like Joe in the example above) will over-pay for a clapped-out old boat, as he hasn't done the research properly. But with the advent of the Internet, where "book values" and comparison shopping are just a mouse-click away, it is getting a lot harder to find "chumps" who will buy clapped-out junk for over market value.

By the way, if you run into such a delusional JERK, just WALK AWAY, period. In the first place, their clapped-out RV or Boat is probably not salvagable anyway, so there is little point in negotiating on price. Oftentimes, even if the owner GAVE you the boat or RV, you'd spend more on repairs than the thing would ever be worth. In the second place, these assholes will never come down on their price. They are delusional - insane. You can't argue with insane people.

If I sound a little harsh here, well, I just spent the weekend looking at Joe's clapped-out motorhome. Joe sent me pictures of the coach from when he bought it 20 years ago. Needless to say it looked quite pristine in the photos. When I arrived after a two-hour drive to a pile of rust and junk, needless to say I was not happy. And Joe couldn't understand why I wouldn't fork over 20 grand for his rig. Just walk away and chalk it up to experience. The worst thing you can do is try to negotiate with the Joe's of the world, or try to convince yourself that "It's not in THAT bad condition, right?" Just.......Walk.........Away!

It makes much better sense to find a late model unit, well maintained, and pay a lot less for it in the first place. Educate yourself as to what you are buying and what maintenance is required. Pay CASH for the recreational toy if you can, or put down a substantial down payment. That way, if you decided to bail out of the hobby, you are not "upside down" like Suzie and Frank, and you don't have to swallow your pride (and take a big depreciation hit) like Joe, Hank, and Henry.

Now the six month rule is simple to apply, although a lot of folks will cheat at it. For example, if you have a boat that you put in storage last year, and then a half the summer goes by without you using it, it is probably time to sell. Why? Because the boat is depreciating in value every day it sits, and it is degrading as well. Sell it before it is worth nothing. If you decide to get back into boating later on (not likely - why did you let it sit half the summer in the first place?) you can buy a comparable used boat for the same money. If you let the boat sit another winter without use, it will likely be in poor shape come next spring, and you'll have a tougher time selling it. Get out now, while you still can.

Simialry, if you are going away to college or in the military, it is better to sell off your car than to try to store it for a year or years. It will continue to depreciate over time, and the money you'd get from selling it would actually appreciate in a bank account. If you really need to, you can always buy another '87 Camaro later on. Trust me on this.

Now again, some folks cheat this rule by saying "Well, I have a bona fide intent to use it in six months" when in fact, they are lying to themselves. Some folks also think that such a rule might be wasteful. "Suppose I end up needing that object later on?" This is the kind of thinking that leads to hoarding disorder.

For example, I have a boat (two, actually, but that's another story). I decided to keep the boat in Florida, and the trailer sat in my yard in Virginia for a few months. After tripping over this thing more than once, I remembered my Six Month Rule and sold the trailer. I got a quick $1500 for the trailer on eBay. Used boat trailers, for some reason, are always in high demand.

Well, a year later - you guessed it - I decided to take the boat from Florida to my new home in New York. I would need a trailer to tow it there - and to store it for the winter. I should have hung onto that old trailer, right? Well, no, actually it all worked out. I could have bought a similar trailer for $1500 if I wanted to. But I found that a brand new trailer, with an aluminum frame, torsion beam axles, and disc brakes could be had for $3000. It was twice the trailer and brand new. So the $1500 I got for the old trailer ended up paying for half the new one. I got a new trailer, and for a year and a half, I didn't have a hoary old boat trailer in my yard, annoying the neighbors (or worse yet, paying storage on a hoary old boat trailer).

In nearly every case, the six month rule has saved me heartache. When we bought our condo in Florida, I sold the motorhome. My partner said "Why sell it? It's paid for!" But I pointed out that our chances of actually using the motorhome were probably nil - and it would require registration, insurance, maintenance, and would continue to depreciate over time. Better off to sell it now, while it was still in top condition than to let it sit for a year or two and then try to clean it up and sell it.

Note that this same "Six Month Rule" can be applied to almost anything you own. Oftentimes we fret and fuss about throwing something away or selling it because "I might need that someday." Someday often never comes and our heirs end up throwing away all our junk that we didn't have the heart to part with. And when this fear of loss becomes an obsession, a disease known as "hoarding disorder" can occur, which can be costly and heartbreaking.

Get rid of it instead of keeping it. The burdens of owning "things" can drag down your psyche and your wallet. Apply the Six Month Rule: If you have not used a vehicle in six months, and have no bona fide intent to use the vehicle in the next six months, sell it, period.

Thursday, December 4, 2008

Never Buy a Condo!

A condominium can be a nightmare for the average consumer, particularly if they pay too much for it.

NEVER buy a condominium!  OK, maybe not never-ever. But you wouldn't be inclined to read an article entitled "You really should think about a condo carefully before buying because a lot of people get burned badly."

And besides, that title is too long.

But seriously, you should think long and hard before buying a Condo. Why? Here's a short list:
1. You are not buying Real Property.

2. You are overpaying for what you are getting.

3. Prices can fluctuate wildly and go down dramatically.

4. Condo Boards are Hell.

5. Special Assessments are even worse.

6. All the pleasures of renting and all the pain of owning.
Let me review these items one at a time, and maybe you'll agree with me that you should never buy a Condo. Bear in mind that I've owned three and made money on all three. But even then, I don't recommend them to others or the faint of heart. I've also owned three "free-standing" properties and made much more money on those, as a percentage of the purchase price. You can make money on a Condo, sure. But you can make a lot MORE money on free-standing Real Estate!
1. You are not buying Real Property.  First of all, even though they call it "Real Estate" and legally it may qualify as "Real" Property, owning a condominium is really just gives you the right to occupy a certain portion of a property. In general, you do not own a section of land distinct from others. In fact, you don't even own a portion of the building you are in. Generally, as a Condo owner, you own the insides of your condo - basically everything up to and including the paint on the walls. In most cases, the plumbing and infrastructure are part of the common element, of which you are just a shareholder.

That's the rub. By owning a Condo, you are now an unwilling shareholder in a very, very poorly run Corporation (very few Condo Associations run smoothly, trust me). So any decision on the structure of the building or how to repair it has to go through the Condo Board (more about that later!). You have little or no control over your destiny as an owner.

And since you only own the land as a shareholder with the other Condo owners, you can't sell off your share to a developer, for example, only your rights to occupy. To sell the underlying land, you usually need a 2/3 or 3/4 agreement among owners (nearly impossible to get). In one situation I witnessed, a developer offered an initial "fair" price to buy out the owners of a run-down Condominium, only to be told by the Board that the Condo was not for sale unless the price was tripled. A year later, the Board realized that the Condo was falling down and that selling out would have been a good idea. Too late - the developer and the market were both gone.
Compare this to my experience with my Fee Simple (free-standing) home. A developer knocked on my door and offered me $200,000 over market value for the home. I said yes on the spot. I could because I owned the home and the land and everything and didn't have to get a "vote" on it.

2. You are overpaying for what you are getting.  The people who really make money on Condos are the developers. For example, take an apartment building with 10 units in it. As an Apartment building, it may fetch $1,000,000 in sales price (for example) if you were to sell it outright as an apartment building. There are not a lot of folks in the apartment building market, so the prices can be fairly low.

Take that same building and divide it into 10 Condos. You can sell those for $200,000 apiece and double your money. Why? Because Joe Working Class has $200,000 he can spend on a "home" or invest in an "investment" but certainly doesn't have a million bucks lying around.

In addition, you can easily get (or could easily get) home loans at reasonable rates with low down payments. If you wanted to borrow a million bucks to buy the whole building, you'd have to get a commercial loan and pay commercial rates, which is a whole different deal.

So it is lucrative to buy an apartment building, gussy it up and then sell it off as Condos.

In terms of bang for the buck, it also is not a very good value. Condos in a given market may cost 1/2 to 3/4 as much as a comparably sized standalone home, and thus are attractive to first-time buyers and folks without a lot of money. However, even at half price, you are getting less than half in value. Since you don't own the land the condo is under, you can't add on to your condo (make a 2 bedroom house into a 5-bedroom luxury mansion) and it can never appreciate as much. There are other, more pragmatic considerations, as we will see.

It may "cost less" to buy a Condo than a house, but you are getting less - a lot less - in the bargain.

3. Prices can fluctuate wildly and go down dramatically. 
When home prices go up, condo prices go up faster, as the high price of homes make buying a condo more attractive. In Northern Virginia in the late 1980's, the price of Condos skyrocketed, and many Real Estate Agents tried to convince me to buy a Condo for over $100,000 when similarly sized homes were selling for $150,000 to $200,000.

When the market went bust in 1989, the free-standing homes stayed about the same in value, but the Condo values plummeted. And this is very typical of the market, historically. In today's market, nearly everything is dropping in value. But Condos by and large are dropping faster and further than free-standing Real Estate. So if you buy a Condo, you might be in for quite a bumpy sleigh ride.

Condo prices fluctuate based on other factors as well. For example, many investors (and the developer) will try to keep the condo fees artificially low to entice buyers. Since most buyers purchase a home based on monthly cost (BAD IDEA for anything, see my other postings) if the Condo fee is LOW, then they can finance MORE to buy the Condo, and prices can go up.

The problem with this scenario is that if the Condo fee goes up (which it always does) then the amount available for monthly financing goes down, and hence the value of the condo.

For example, I bought a Condo for $40,000. The monthly mortgage was $300 and the Condo fee was $300. The insurance and taxes were another $100 a month. So for $700 a month, I could rent this Condo out and break even.

Now fast-forward 10 years. The Condo is now paid for. The Condo fee is now $500 a month and the insurance and taxes are now $150 a month. Rents have gone up to $900 a month there, so there is $250 left over to pay for the mortgage, if someone wanted to buy the unit and pay the same monthly cost as renting (why pay more to own? It makes no sense).

As you can see, $250 finances a lot less than $300, so theoretically, the condo should be worth LESS in value. As the other fees go UP, the value of the condo goes DOWN. And as people play with the fees, the values can zig-zag all over the place. Developers keep fees low, and prices are high. Then repairs are needed, so Condo fees go up, and prices drop. It is a see-saw effect.

Other scenarios include the neighborhood changing, a major assessment needed (more about that later) or a lawsuit involving the Condo is filed. An example of this latter case occurred where a friend of mine bought a Condo in Crystal City in the 1980s for $170,000, which was a lot of money back then when houses in the County could be had for the same amount. The developer cut corners on the construction and the sides of the high-rise started peeling off and falling on people and cars below. The Condo Board sued the developer.

Immediately, prices plummeted. One rule of thumb is that if the Condo Board gets involved in a lawsuit, prices drop dramatically. No one wants to buy into a lawsuit, and that is exactly what you would be doing if you bought a unit there. Add to that the uncertainty of the outcome (How much would the repairs be? Who would pay for them?) and the ugly scaffolding on the side of the building, and my friend's $170,000 luxury Condo is now worth $80,000 a few years later.

Now, eventually, the suit settled, and 10 years later, he sold at a tidy profit. But if he had to sell in the interim, well, he would have lost everything. And many people in his building did.

Condos fluctuate in value dramatically, and much more so than a free-standing home.

4. Condo Boards are Hell. I have alluded to some of the problems of Condo Boards above. The problem with Condo Boards is not that they are evil or "Nazis" but that they are basically amateurs at what they are doing. Very few Board Members have the experience to manage what can be a 200, 300 or even a 1000 unit property.

Being on the Board is a thankless job, as no matter how good a job you think you are doing, someone is going to call you a "Nazi" or say you are not doing a very good job. And usually, you are not getting paid a nickel for all that grief. So most people quit after a year or two and more inexperienced people get on the Board and the process repeats.

The problem too is that owners are basically spoiled children. They don't own a real home, so they don't understand that repairs and maintenance have to be done. So they want the condo fee slashed (which drives up resale prices) at the expense of long-term maintenance. In one condo I owned, this ended up causing no end of grief, as special assessments had to be made later on (more on that later) to make repairs that money should have been set aside for years earlier.

Condo Boards are also easily distracted with trivia and social issues. Boards end up wasting hours and hours of time and alienating residents by issuing trivial regulations on how balconies should be used and what size doorknocker you can have. Granted, some of these regulations are needed, as when no rules are made, all heck breaks loose. But often, these rules come across as arbitrary and trivial and detract from the enjoyment of the property. If you own a HOUSE, you can paint it purple if you want to (in most cases) without having to deal with some amateur Board of Busybodies.

In short, Condo Boards spend too much time on nonsense (silly rules), and not enough time on the real work - maintaining the Condominium structure, common elements, and finances.

5. Special Assessments are even worse.  
Special Assessments are usually made when major repairs are needed. For example, in one Condo I was in, the balconies started falling off the buildings. Each owner needed to kick in $10,000 to repair the balconies. This was tough, as not many people have $10,000 laying around and it is a lot of money to come up with.

As a result, some owners had to sell their Condos when the special assessment was made. Since the assessment was due, it depresses the Condo price. Special Assessments are bad for Condo prices, as they tell the story of poor Condo management by the Board, and the presence of expensive repairs needed to the buildings. So Joe Condo Owner sells his condo at a loss because he can't make the assessment. Sometimes, Joe Condo Owner ends up losing his Condo when a lien is placed on the property.

Meanwhile, Joe Investor, who shouted down the Board and insisted on low, low Condo fees had already sold his Condo at the peak of the market, before the assessment was due. So he makes a pile of dough.
Assessments can end up being an unfair tax on owners who happen to be owning at a particular point in time. So some owners, who buy and sell at the wrong times, might end up paying one, two, or even three "special assessments" in the tens of thousands of dollars. Meanwhile, other owners, who buy and sell at different times may dodge the bullet and not have to pay anything. Arguably it is not a "fair" way of paying for such repairs, which should be amortized over time.

Most States (Florida, for example) have laws that Condo Associations have to set aside money for repairs, so these assessments do not have to be made. But I've been there - and been shouted down by the non-resident investors, who wanted "low condos fees" so they could "flip" their Condos for a tidy profit.

A special note on Assessments and Repairs: Getting someone to repair a Condo is a nightmarish headache. Few Contractors want to deal with vacillating Condo Boards, who will bicker and argue over every last detail. As a result, if you need a new roof, Joe's Roofing likely will not take the job or even return your phone calls. Condos end up paying extra - a lot extra - to get work done. And since every detail and part is discussed and bickered over, it takes forever to get anything done. And when it is done, no one is ever happy, as everything was a compromise and all the Johnny Fence-sitters will just sit around and say "I told you so!" and of course, blame the hapless Board Members. If you want to see passive-aggression in action, buy a Condo!

6. All the pleasures of renting and all the pain of owning.  In addition to all the financial burdens, a Condo provides all the "pleasures" of renting an apartment with all the "pains" of owning a house.

With an apartment, you have to learn to live with the neighbor's loud stereo and his nightly tap-dancing lessons on the floor above. You might have to share a coin-op washer and dryer, fight over parking spaces, and live with your neighbor's cooking smells. Renting can be a pain in the butt, which is why many people look to buying a home in the first place.

If you live in a big city, the problems of apartment living are pretty much inevitable, as buying a free-standing home in Manhattan is not an option for many. But more and more lately, Condos are going up in the COUNTRY, miles from anywhere, where land is cheap. It makes no sense at all, except to the developer, of course.

Owning a home can be a hassle, too. You have to paint the house, mow the lawn, and clean the gutters. Most of these "outside" chores are handled by your Condo fee. So you don't have to do them physically, but you do have to PAY for them - and you don't get to chose the provider of those services. And you don't have the option of saving money by "doing it yourself" as you do with a free-standing home.

But, like a home, you are generally responsible for all the inside stuff. So unlike renting an apartment, when you own a Condo and the stove breaks or the toilet backs up, there is no landlord to call - you have to fix it yourself or pay someone to fix it.

And even though you own the "insides", you still may have to let the Condo maintenance man into your apartment to repair some of the common elements (air conditioning, for example, in one of my units). So, just like a tenant in an apartment, you have to let Harry the Maintenance Man have a key to your place. If you thought owning a Condo meant peace and quiet and having your own space, think again.

And even though you "own" the insides of your unit, in many Condos, moving walls or other changes require an extensive approval procedure from the Board (see above). Even hanging a wreath on your door or putting out a floor mat may get you in trouble with the Condo Board (See Silly Rules, above).

So you have none of the advantages of owning and all the problems of renting.
So, why do people buy Condos? For some, in the big city (New York), that is all there is, other than mansions and brownstones, which are out of reach of most folks. But for many, they are sold as a "less expensive" alternative to a home. I think for this latter group, buying a Condo can often be a costly mistake.

While a home may cost a little more, it is worthwhile to actually own real land, and have the "quiet enjoyment" of it than to deal with the hassles and possible financial problems of Condo ownership.

Many others like the idea of "no maintenance" which, as I have noted, is really a fantasy. While the Association may mow the lawn, you are still liable for maintenance of the unit. If "no maintenance" is high on your list, renting a luxury apartment might be a better alternative, as in addition to "no maintenance" you have "no worries" about the market value of your unit.

While rents may fluctuate, historically, they tend to increase only gradually. When rents spike, even a small amount, this encourages construction of more rental properties or more properties are converted to rentals. So the idea that you will be left out on the street by rent increases is a bit dramatic. Yes, it is possible to be priced out of a particular neighborhood or apartment building, but the same can happen with Condos, as fees and taxes skyrocket. So owning a Condo doesn't make you "safe" from increased costs.

And that is the one very odd thing about Condos. Many people will PAY MORE to OWN a Condo than they would to rent the same Condo in the same development. They argue they are "building equity" and that the resale value will be higher. But as my examples above illustrate, and the recent market aptly demonstrates, Condos can be a neat way to create negative equity in a real hurry.

I've done well with three Condos and a duplex, but I always kept in mind the following:
1. Do the Math: The condo should not cost more to own (in monthly costs) that it does to rent. If it cheaper to rent one than to buy, don't buy, period. In one instance, I bought one for a friend to rent. Since it was cheaper to buy than rent, I could rent it to her and break even. In another case, I bought one as a vacation home and rental. It was cheaper for me to stay there than in a hotel, so it made sense, and I visited it often. When I wasn't there, I rented it out to cover costs. If it had cost more to own than it would to stay in a decent hotel, it would have made no sense to own it.

 2. A Condo is not a "poor man's house": You should not look at a Condo as a "starter home" because you cannot afford a house. If a house is only slightly more, or similarly priced houses can be had for the price of a Condo (but perhaps not as opulent) then bite the bullet and buy the house. When I was shopping for my first home, it was tempting to look at a Condo as an "affordable alternative" but I was glad that I bought REAL LAND in the long run. 1/3 of a an acre in Fairfax County appreciated much further than a comparably priced Condo ever could (and my house, it was bulldozed, so that goes to show you where the real value in REAL ESTATE is - in the LAND, not the structures).

3. Condo Prices Go UP and go DOWN: When I bought the $40,000 Condo, it was for what the original owner had paid for it - 10 years prior when the unit went Condo. In the interim, the price skyrocketed to $80,000 and then fell back to $40,000. Since I've owned it, prices have jumped to nearly $300,000 and then back down to the mid 100's. You have to be prepared for the value to drop down and live with that. For that reason, never pay too much for a Condo! If prices have recently gone up, ask yourself if you really think they will keep going up and up and up, or might level off or drop. If you look at his realistically, you likely won't get burned.

But all that being said, the best bet is to hold out for a real home on a real lot of land, if it is not that much more than a Condo. Don't confuse the new sheet-rock and shiny appliances of a "luxury" Condo with real value. A run down house on a 1/4-acre lot is worth more because you actually own the land. Appliances and sheet-rock can be replaced relatively inexpensively, and thus a house can be improved in value greatly. A Condo, on the other hand, has nowhere to do but down.

Edited 12/15/2014

UPDATE May 2017:  A reader sends a link to this story which discloses extreme abuse by board members, some of which appear not to even own units in the buildings.   This illustrates the conundrum with Condo ownership.  If you get involved in Condo politics, you will be frustrated and angry.   If you don't get involved, bad things will happen!

Hard to feel sorry for owners of "luxury" condos who let this sort of thing happen.

UPDATE 2021:  It is sad to see, but when people defer maintenance because "they are on a fixed income" then bad things can happen.  Billion-dollar buildings, managed by amateurs!  Better off renting!  And when bad things happen, prices can collapse.

Monday, December 1, 2008

De-Militarizing Christmas

It's Time We De-Militarized Christmas!

In the spirit of the Holiday season, I feel it is important to address how Christmas has evolved from a spiritual holiday into yet another excuse for Corporate America to induce you to rack up your credit cards so you'll be in debt another year.

Yea, I already know what you are going to say, "Oh great, another Scrooge, trying to destroy the spirit of Christmas with his bah, humbug!"

But that is not the case. Corporate interests, aided by the media (who live off their advertising dollars) have ratcheted up the pressure on Christmas over the years until it has become something of a long-running joke. Not only does this disrespect the religious nature of the holidays, it can cause serious financial burdens on families, which can lead to psychological stress and difficulties.

Nearly everyone I know has mixed memories about Christmas. Except for those few people who do actually seem to lead the Norman Rockwell kind of life, most folks approach the Christmas holiday with reservations and also bad memories of the ghosts of Christmas past.

For me, it was my Mother. She bought into the whole militarized Christmas theory, lock, stock, and barrel. She felt it was her place to insure that every Christmas was a series of events, which needed to be performed with military precision, in order to pull off the "Perfect Christmas." In addition to cookie baking, carol singing, home decorating, holiday parties, family meals, and a host of other tasks, she also felt that she needed to go out and buy, buy, buy her way to the "Perfect Christmas." Since she could rarely live up to her own expectations, Christmas became a time of concentrated guilt and self-loathing. I see this still happen today in many suburban households.

As a child and often the recipient of this largess, I didn't complain much at first. But over the years, I began to realize that I would have been much happier with a truly "Merry" Christmas rather than one laden with booty - and one structured so tightly that it became more of a guilt-laden ritual than a celebration of the birth of Christ or a time for true family harmony.

I would have been happier if my family could have been happy at Christmas, particularly my Mother. That would have been a greater gift than all the shiny bikes and train sets in the world.

The media starts cranking up the Christmas Angst earlier and earlier every year. If you have a TeeVee, the messages are relentlessly pounded into your head day after day. (See my article, Shoot your Television, in this blog). Even on the radio and in the newspapers, the hype is present.

Today it is all about "Black Friday" - will the shoppers shop? How much was sold? Where did YOU shop? What is the "hot gift" that is so hard to find this year? Christmas won't be "prefect" without a Cabbage-Patch doll or a Tickle-Me Elmo. And people buy into this crap, too.

It is all hype, of course. The day after Thanksgiving is NOT the busiest shopping day of the year (that occurs a week before Christmas). But the entire thing misses the point. Christmas is not about buying things, or at least it shouldn't be.

It's time to de-militarize Christmas. To slow it down, to put an end to the endless preparations and decorations and overdone hoopla and fake "traditions". But moreover, from an economic standpoint, it's time to put an end to destructive over-spending on junk that you and your friends don't want or need - and the accompanying debt it creates.

The messages in the media are not very subtle. Advertisements for "Big Box" stores show a woman shopping with a shopping list. A Big Screen TeeVee for Grandpa! A surround sound system for Uncle Joe! A new video game console for the Nephew!

Whoa! Wait a minute. Excuse me? Am I getting this right that these retailers think we are going to drop several hundred dollars apiece for gifts for people who are not even in our immediate family? (and by immediate family, I mean your spouse and kids).

Yup. That's what they want you to think. And of course, it is exactly what works in their favor. They want to play upon your sense of guilt - that somehow you are not doing Christmas properly. Perhaps if you spend more, it will all be better.

And so, the Christmas war escalates. Every year, many folks (women seem particularly targeted) worry about what to get as a gift for their family, friends, long-lost relatives, neighbors, even the mailman. And then they obsess with the "Did they give me a gift of equal value or not?" angst. If a gift exchanger gave a gift of lesser value, then they can gloat about it and even regale their friends about how they gave Joe Blow a nice gift -and look at this piece of shit he gave me in return! I've seen this firsthand, and more than once. Merry Freakin' Christmas, Right? How tacky.

Of course, if they gave Joe Blow a gift and Joe gives back something of greater value, they then obsess about it. They can't let Joe get away with that! They gave a year's membership in the lint-of-the-month club and Joe gave them a Rolex watch! Embarrassed, they run out at the last minute to get Joe a second "makeup present" that "they were going to give all along" and try to even the playing field. Sick, sick, sick!

The problem with this type of competitive gift-giving is that no matter how you play that sick game, you never come out "Even Steven". Once in a great while, you might come up with the "perfect gift" that is reasonably priced and thoughtful and exactly what the other person wants. But it rarely happens, so you end up disappointed (and they do too) and all you've done is squander a ton of money. And when it does, it just instills feelings of guilt in the other person, if they are playing the militarized Christmas game.

The retail business preys upon these feelings of insecurity. Go to the malls right now and you'll find stacks of pre-approved "gifts" for giving. Some of them are nice, others are just things that a person really doesn't need. Others are just plain junk. Ronco owes its existence to Christmas, offering those all-important "last minute gifts" like the ChiaPet or Pocket Fisherman. They serve as a talisman for gift-giving, as if to say, "Look, I spend the prerequisite $25-$50 range gift that a person of your relationship status qualifies for and for which I expect a similar price-range gift in return."

Garages and attics are full of such gifts.

In addition to the emotional stress and damage caused by all of this, as well as the sheer wastefulness of it all, overdoing Christmas can lead to financial stress as well. Many folks, in "the spirit of the season" end up racking up major credit card debt trying to keep up with the arms race that Christmas has become.

There are, however, other ways to live.

To begin with, stop taking your social cues from the television. What they say on the evening news, or worse yet, advertisements, is not very often sound advice on how to live productively and happily. The average American watches 6-8 hours of TeeVee a day. This bad for your physical and metal health and a waste of time. But in addition, it means that many Americans are getting all their societal cues - what they think are "norms" from the TeeVee. Often these cues are twisted and distorted.

One Christmas advertisement from a few years back shows Joe Husband handing the wife a box on Christmas morning that has a set of car keys in it. Out front is parked a brand new honkin' gas-hog SUV with a giant bow on it. The wife goes ecstatic! Gee honey, I love you! This is sick.

A major purchase like a car is something that should not be a "surprise" to your spouse, but rather carefully discussed and researched together. It also is somewhat a sexist premise. Even if you have millions to spend, wouldn't the wife like to have some say in the make, model, or even COLOR of the car she drives?

Again, it is all about selling the fantasy of Christmas, not the reality. And if people can be conned into believing they will be heroes or their wife will love them more if they buy the wife a car for Christmas, then you might sell a lot more cars. Frankly, though, I think the real subtext of this retail fantasy is that the husband will enjoy the perceived envy of his neighbors if he can make it look like he can afford to give a car as a present.

And that is what drives a lot of people. Human beings will spend ENORMOUS amounts of money trying to impress people they don't even know. And oftentimes, it is the people with the least amount of money who spend the most.

Think about it. Every Christmas, we used to drive around and look at Christmas lights. Where were the best displays? Not in the wealthy neighborhoods, No. Rather, some of the poorest or lower-middle-class neighborhoods would have the most fantastic displays of lights. People who could barely afford to make their car payments were spending hundreds, if not thousands of dollars on lighting displays. It is fun to look at, but why exactly are they doing this? They want and need acceptance and status is my guess - or at least that is a partial explanation.

It is possible to celebrate Christmas and ratchet down the hype. Not only that, it is much easier to truly ENJOY Christmas when you de-militarize it. It is hard to do at first - like quitting a highly addictive drug. And like drug use, what makes it hard is that all your friends and family are "users" too. They will pressure you to stay high and tempt you to fall off the wagon. Just say No!

The way to start, which more and more people are doing these days, is to limit gift giving to immediate family members. By immediate family, I mean the people living in your home. Your spouse, your children. Maybe a live-in relative. Leave it at that. Tell everyone else that you are not going to exchange gifts. Use whatever excuse you want to - the present economy is a good one.

You'd be surprised at the reaction. Some folks, of course, will accuse you of being a "Scrooge," as they are so tightly wound-up in the Christmas hype and playing the Christmas game that they will view you as an apostate (ironically, as those sort of people are the least likely to find spirituality in the celebration of the birth of Christ). But you'd be surprised at how many folks will breath a sigh of relief that they can cross one more name off their "Christmas gift list". You have depressurized their Christmas somewhat.

If they insist on giving a gift, ask them to donate something to a charity in your name or whatever. If they still insist on giving you a gift, accept it graciously, but don't feel obligated to reciprocate.

You see, that is the whole point of gift-giving, or at least the way it should be. A gift should be freely given, from the heart, with no expectation of something in return. A gift given with the expectation of something in return, with the exchange carefully and critically evaluated in terms of relative values - that is not a gift at all. That is bartering.

Yet the retailers love to use the phrase "exchanging gifts at Christmas" to reinforce the idea that it is a quid pro quo exchange process, not a spontaneous act of love and generosity.

The retail industry also would like you to believe that giving a gift can only be done at Christmas, or on a birthday or special occasion. The quid pro quo of the gift giving process must be tallied up every holiday. If you give someone a gift in November, that doesn't count toward the Christmas exchange ledger!

Once you've gotten away from the "I have to give everyone a gift because society says so" mentality, you'll find that you may be inspired to give someone a gift anyway, not because you have to, but because you have or see something that you truly want to give them, with no expectation of anything in return. And if you are not inspired, you don't have to give them a gift.

Let's face it, once you are past your eighth birthday and you get the shiny new bicycle for Christmas, you really don't need anything for Christmas. So why do we keep throwing merchandise at each other? It's time to call it quits. It's time to put an end to the war of gifts.

Home decorating was another area my Mother would obsess about during Christmas. Unlike the Norman Rockwell paintings where a merry family comes together to light the star at the top of the tree, the reality of Christmas in our house (and many others, from what I can see) was a stressful evening of "where's the freakin' box of ornaments?" along with the joyful task of trying to get those damn lights to work (followed by a late night run to buy a new string).

For my Mother (and a lot of women) the tree (and house decorations in general) was yet another source of angst. She felt that she was being judged on the aesthetics of the design. It was not a celebration of Christmas and the solstice or whatever, but an artistic statement that no matter how carefully prepared, came up short when compared to the decorations of others.

And it is not surprising this happens, either. In many suburban communities, decorating has become fiercely competitive. You can even hire professional tree designers to come to your house to do your tree for you. Ouch!

Decorating a Christmas tree should be fun, not a chore. If it has turned into a chore, ask yourself why and what you are doing wrong. Scaling back a bit on decorations is one option. Many folks feel that in addition to a tree, they need outdoor lighting, a wreath, a gingerbread house, etc., etc., etc. This is what I call the "Martha Stewart" syndrome. That woman has done more to damage the psyche of women everywhere when it comes to Christmas. Because, let's face it, there is no way you can live up to the expectations and standards of Martha Stewart. But look on the bright side - chances are, you don't have a felony conviction record, either.

Christmas decorations tend to accumulate over time. Many folks will give ornaments as gifts, so over time, you will end up with more and more decorations. Christmas ornaments, by the way, can be a thoughtful and inexpensive gift that someone might actually use. So there is little point in going out and buying a ton of Christmas stuff when you are just starting out. Trust me, you'll end up with an attic full in no time.

Like anything else, the key is to work out a budget based on what you can spend in cash. The idea of financing Christmas with a credit card is a really bad idea. When February rolls around, the sky is gray and the snow is a foot deep, the idea of making monthly installments to pay for your eggnog will really depress you.

Another suggestion is to take a holiday at Christmas. Get out of town. Fly down to Florida or some warm Caribbean island and really enjoy yourself rather than stress out about decorations and family. I suggested this to a friend of mine once, and it worked out well emotionally and financially.
He was moaning about "having to go see his dysfunctional parents" for Christmas and how miserable he would be, staying at their house (in his old room) and how his Father would inevitably get drunk and abusive. Once back in the family home, he was the child again, and his abusive Father took advantage of it. Ten days stuck in a house with your family with nothing to do but eat, watch TV, and relive your childhood is a recipe for disaster. My friend's wife was none too happy about the whole deal. He felt trapped by convention (reinforced by the TeeVee) that one must "go home for Christmas" every year.

If you are in college, going home for Christmas might be in order. But once you leave the family unit, your goal in life is to start your own family. At that point, Christmas is something that you can (and should) celebrate in your own home, with your own immediate family. Going back to Mon and Dad's house every year at Christmas, when you are over 30, is just embarrassing. Grow up! This is not to say that you can't go back ever. Just that you are not obligated to.

So my friend flew down to a warm Caribbean island and enjoyed 10 days with his spouse. I can tell you that she enjoyed it much more than the fun abusive Christmases she had in the past at his folk's place. Once the chain of dependency was broken, there was no going back.

Naturally, his parents and even siblings accused him of being a Christmas traitor, for not respecting "family traditions." But at some point, you have to start living your own life, not your parents. You have to grow up and start your own traditions. Sadly, for many, this never occurs until their parents pass away, at which point they look back on a life wasted trying to fulfill their parent's expectations and always coming up short.

Many of my Christian friends are way ahead of the curve on this whole thing, of course. They look, in horror, at how Christmas has been subverted from one of the two great Christian religious celebrations of the year (Easter arguably being much more important) into a crass commercial secular celebration.

Part of this is because people feel the need to "include" non-Christians and non-observant Christians in the celebration, making Christmas larger and larger and more secular. The larger Christmas becomes, the greater the need to make it secular and more inclusive to non-Christians (and non-observant Christians). The more people who are included in this secular Christmas celebration, the larger it becomes. It is a vicious cycle.

The manger scene gets moved off the town square, only to be replaced by candy canes, a Christmas tree, and a frosty the snowman. While the separation of Church and State dictate that a manger scene is not permissible, the commercial interests of any municipality dictate that secular decorations are required.

Why this is so, eludes me. Jews and Muslims feel no pressing need to create secular icons to allow Christians to participate in their holidays. Why have Christian holidays in particular been secularized? Yes, Mr. Easter Bunny, I'm talking about you!

So one aspect of demilitarizing Christmas might be to get back to the more spiritual side of the holiday. Rather than look at Christmas as a series of chores and purchases upon which you will be judged and evaluated, take a good hard look at what the holiday really means.

Sure, we talk about the "True Meaning of Christmas" a lot. But it has become nothing more than a trite phrase in the litany of Christmas paraphernalia. Even Christmas stories like "A Christmas Carol" have been subverted in this regard. Scrooge discovers the "True Meaning of Christmas" is to spend money lavishing Bob Cratchet and his family with gifts - the only error in his previous ways was in his penny-pinching. Generosity is a fine and wonderful thing, but it hardly is the "True Meaning of Christmas".

The Grinch takes away all the decorations and toys from Who-ville, only to discover the Whos still celebrate "The True Meaning of Christmas" (the presence of a Who-Jesus noticeably lacking). Tellingly, the Grinch becomes a hero, not for getting back to the "True Meaning of Christmas" but for bringing back all the loot for everyone to enjoy. Which they do, in grand fashion.

Thus, even the societal messages decrying the commercialization of Christmas end up celebrating it. Jesus merits no mention in such stories. It's all about gifting.

There is an excellent "Far Side" comic in that regard. The disciples are gathered together with a "Happy Birthday Jesus" cake, and as an angry Christ entered the doorway, someone says, "You know he HATES it when people make a big deal out of his birthday!"

And I suspect that he does. Christ would be appalled at how Christmas has turned out. I suspect if he returned to earth, he would lay waste to several malls and damn to hell those who write Christmas songs.

If you are a recording artist, one way to insure a secure retirement is to write a Christmas song. The royalties will pour in every year, as they play your song over, and over, and over, and over for a month before Christmas. Even if the song is trite, it will get played. The radio stations are desperate for anything Christmas-related.

Can't think of something to write about? Make something up! Sure, we know about the wise men and the shepherds who tended their flocks by night. That's been done. Heck, throw a "little drummer boy" into the mix. It ain't in the Bible, but who cares?. Pa-rup-a-pup-bum! Or maybe three ships can come sailing in - into landlocked Bethlehem. Or maybe the Pizza delivery guy can show up bearing cheesy sticks. Whatever. With all the "made up" additions to our Christmas traditions, that manger is getting quite crowded.

Don't want to write about Jesus? Well, make something ELSE up! Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer, Frosty the Snowman, even "Dominic the Christmas Donkey!" It's all been done! Perhaps there is some small Christmas rodent or insect that has not been sung about yet. Sammy, the Christmas Cockroach. It writes itself!

Yea, I know, I sound like "a Scrooge." And that is part of the Christmas marketing strategy, thank you very much, Charles Dickens. If anyone DARES to criticize how stupid and commercial Christmas has become, they are shouted down as a "Scrooge" which is akin to calling someone a Communist - or worse.

But it is not Scrooge-like to insist that Christmas have some other meaning than a retail orgy serenaded by 30 days of really bad music. It is not Scrooge-like to insist that December be a month enjoyed for things other than a month-long holiday. It is not Scrooge-like to reclaim our lives from this orgy of spending and low-self-esteem and utter manipulation.

Christmas should not leave you depressed and broke. Christmas should not be a set of unrealistic expectations that are never met. Christmas should be a time for real joy and cheer.
And it can be.

The power to make it that way rests in your hands.